With my new living experiences, I’ve learned a few helpful things that will assit me not going nuts when I interact with people.
General rule: most people can take their words and shove them.
I am not saying that from now on I am going to flip of my supervisor during my performance review. Its not that. But I’m going to take people’s words with a grain of salt.
That being said, I came to this conclusion both from work and home.
From work I got a more negative than positive review recently. I love constructive criticism, but there was none. Then when that months productivity report came out I was rank 3 out of 18. Efffff you supervisor. I could run circles around you in your position! I guarantee I could motivate people to be awesome and hate their jobs less. In this instance, during this review session, the words are just there without meaning. I dislike when people run their mouth for no reason.
At home, living with Asian in-laws, its even more extreme. 11pm….on my Thursday of my week…”Cherie why do you have so much dirty laundry? ” (internal dialogue: “why the hell does it matter?”) Actual response : ” it will be done tomorrow. Me and Clifton worked out all week…that’s why there is so much!” *With awkward smile* “Cherie why don’t you get a job that makes 50k?” “Cherie why do you was dishes like that?” “Cherie, tell Clifton to stop smoking and to loose weight…”
This week I got my first positive reinforcement comment. It took 2 months! I don’t even do things with error, almost ever! Imagine if I were a fuck up for real!
So, I’m not saying don’t listen to people. Some of the information given at work or by in-laws is useful. Surely not all of it is useful.
I now understand why people leave the house at 18 in some cultures, I also understand why people start their own businesses. I believe it is human nature to try to appease people, but man, sanity comes first. Annnnnnnd there’s not just one GOOD/EFFECTIVE way to do any one thing. I wish more people would be open minded, and interested in making things better rather than padding their egos.